Crying Autistic


Living in denial
Hating my existence
Unable to accept
The truth and fact
Deep inside me

Autism is the
Label given to me
Coming from my family members
Many time I deny it
Only to surrender and learn to
Embrace autism in my life

Knowing the angst of my pain
But I choose to smile to others
Showing the brighter side of my true self
Wishing to cheers the broken-hearted
Yet others tend to
Break my heart
And
Take advantage
Of my kindness
Only to land myself
Vulnerable
Miserable
Feeling the awful pangs of hurt
From all the
Pre-judgements

When my world is closing
You come into my life with your own agenda
Soothing words to uplift me
Then you hurt me four times
Pushing me forward three step backs
Then pull me backward four step backs
Why are you playing with my innocence?!
Why are you entering into my world?
Giving me FALSE hopes
Only to DASH it!
Enough of your mental game!
Stop!
My Lord sees it and warns me of your cunningness
To PREVENT me from further hurt!
This IS the FENCE of my BOUNDARIES!


Inspiration On: Tuesday, 21 April 2015 at 12am

These are the summary of my experiences birthed in poetry. I thank my Lord and Saviour for the right words to SHOUT it out. Wish you all have good days and thank you.

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34 thoughts on “Crying Autistic

  1. Oh man is this ever powerful and so poignant! As a special educator working with students who have profound mental challenges my heart always goes out to students who deal with disabilities such as Autism. People like Temple Grandin have helped me understand at least a little bit the challenges that folks with autism face every day but just a little bit. Your poem helps me understand a little more, thank you. i want to be more compassionate each day to people I work with, interact with and live with.

  2. Nicely said Yoshiko ๐Ÿ™‚ I like this bit best “But I choose to smile to others
    Showing the brighter side of my true self”, I hope you can keep doing so without hindrance and with your Lords blessings ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Yoshiko, to me your are wonderfully perfect my sister! Your genuinely selfless heart always inspires me. What can one take away from you, for within you lives Gods eternal blessing of love. And it is that love which will always help you to overcome all things! Our imperfections are made perfect by God’s love, and I have many! Know you are truly loved my sister by those who know you well! Thanks for always sharing, and the spiritual hugs you always send my way!

    • Thank you, Wendell, to remind me the love that help me to overcome all things. Even I am not perfect.
      You are welcome and may you be strengthened too by God’s grace.

  4. Your writing has touched me profoundly. You are always that “Happy Smile” you wrote about. I thank you deeply for sharing and you are in my prayers! Your faith will get you through! Thank you for all that you do….you may not see it, but you are a light in the darkness!

  5. Pingback: SHOWCASE — Yoshiko | The Rattling Bones

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