Girls’ Invisible Autism

Internalized feelings
Silence with unfamiliar people
Attraction towards pets
Being lost in own world
Termed as being shy

In silence
Overwhelmed with sensory overload
Anxiety and fear deep inside
Masking with expressionless face
Pouring out my hearts to Jesus
Seeking to overcome own challenges
Observing and smile to babies and pets


Inspiration On: Saturday, 22 April 2017 at 8:11am

I divulge my autism issue with friends whom I feel comfortable with. My struggle is in communication. Socializing with strangers is not a problem. It depends on whom I feel comfortable to talk to. My friends label me as being introvert and shy. Am I shy? That’s my question.

I do not understand myself. Seeking to have self-understanding. Last year, the autism diagnosis had tested me positive. It created mixed feelings – fearful, upset, relief. “Why You Cannot See My Daughter’s Autism?” news help me to have a better understanding of myself.

Money

Lack of money is worrying
Tons of money is also worrying
Turn money upside down
Erase middle letter
Depict wouah
WOAH is the simplified version
The worried feeling
Money causes woe
Money causes anxiety

Producing a new currency
Bit Coin attracts predators
Predators like sharks
Smell the new currency
Uses their knowledge to
Hack and steal the money

Money is valuable paper
Money are considered dangerous
Money blinds the eyes
Money is always at fault
The problem lies on the owner
Owner’s focus
Owner’s mindset
Owner’s heart
Owner’s priority sequence

Two choices of path
To earn money
Only one path to decide
Earn money honestly
Or earn dirty money


Inspiration On: Wednesday, 13 November 3013 at 6:41pm to 6:54pm
Inspiration Ends On: Friday, 22 November 2013 at 7:35pm

With my current situation looking for jobs and earn money makes me realize that lack of money is difficult. Then I realised that a wealthy family also have their worries from being robbed. Therefore, this poetry is birthed out.

Bleak

I am feeling helpless.
Where do I go?

Everything seems very dark
I can’t see anything
What do I touch?
Where do I go?
Heart missed a beat
No, not just that.
Fear engulfs my heart
I can hear clearly
My heartbeat is beating
Rapidly. And also loud.

Anxiety, depression, fear, sadness
Are the feelings that
I am going through.

Anxious of the future
Past regrets came back
Something I had wished
I would not do.

Depressed of the previous
Mistakes I had done.
What I can do?
No turning back to
Correct all my mistakes.

Presently, everyday seems dull.
Everyday, always repeat the
Same repeated boring tasks.

My goal is getting
Much further away from
My grasp due to
Doing many unnecessary errands.

I feel hopeless and
Everything seems bleak and
I don’t know where
To go for help.


Inspiration On: Sunday, 7 November 2010 at 5:50AM