Girls’ Invisible Autism

Internalized feelings
Silence with unfamiliar people
Attraction towards pets
Being lost in own world
Termed as being shy

In silence
Overwhelmed with sensory overload
Anxiety and fear deep inside
Masking with expressionless face
Pouring out my hearts to Jesus
Seeking to overcome own challenges
Observing and smile to babies and pets


Inspiration On: Saturday, 22 April 2017 at 8:11am

I divulge my autism issue with friends whom I feel comfortable with. My struggle is in communication. Socializing with strangers is not a problem. It depends on whom I feel comfortable to talk to. My friends label me as being introvert and shy. Am I shy? That’s my question.

I do not understand myself. Seeking to have self-understanding. Last year, the autism diagnosis had tested me positive. It created mixed feelings – fearful, upset, relief. “Why You Cannot See My Daughter’s Autism?” news help me to have a better understanding of myself.

Why Some Companies Are Trying to Hire More People on the Autism Spectrum

It is a great news for the autistic people stated in the Why Some Companies Are Trying to Hire More People on the Autism Spectrum news. 

The news also help me to understand the reason I behave in a certain way 

  1. Looking at data. Now I enjoy studying human behaviours and artistic endeavours. Now reading data bores me. 
  2. Enjoy mathematical concepts and even artistic concepts
  3. Attention to detail
  4. Focus over long periods of time, and looking at large bodies of information and spotting anomalies

The Brain Difference That Allows People With Autism To Pick Up Tiny Details

The article about The Brain Difference That Allows People With Autism To Pick Up Tiny Details enlightens me to understand myself better and how I can overcome my weaknesses. I also hope such articles can help the younger autistic people to understand themselves better and receive earlier help. In conclusion, the autistic more likely to use two parts of their brain. Thus cause the slowdown. 
Prayer 

Heavenly Father, You are the One who created me and knows me best. You have forgiven my sins. I forgive those who sins against me. Many times, You are speaking to me to see the trees and the tiny details of every observation. Please enable me to use the natural abilities You have blessed me with. In Jesus’ name I ask. Amen. 

The More I Sing

The more I sing
The more you can’t sleep

The more I sing
The more you can’t sleep

The more I sing
The more you sing

The more you sing
The more you can’t sleep

The more you teach me how to sing
The more you sing

The more you sing
The more I sing

Sing! Sing. Sing! Sing.


Inspiration On: Saturday, 12 November 2016

Upon returning home from my son’s graduation, I give him shower and pet him to take nap. So I read to him. Then he requests me to sing him to sleep. Although he knows I sing out of tune, he guides me how to sing. Thus the above song is birthed out and sing to him with my own melody. Finally, I ask my husband to sing to him. Wish you all have good days and thank you.

Extreme Opposing Patterns

Judge others harshly
Lack of understanding
Overlook own mistakes
Extremely self-forgiving
Finding fault on others
Searching for scapegoats
Seeking control on others’ lives
Protecting own interest

Extremely forgiving others’ mistakes easily
Full of empathy and understanding
No excuse with own mistakes
Admit own faults
Beware of being the scapegoat
Be sensitive to manipulative spirits
Protect others’ interest
Seek the Lord’s intervention to stop being controlled

Circumstances and situations
May cause
Both extremes switch places
Thus the cycle continues

Maintain self-care purpose
In order to
Care others require
Recognise the higher power
Omnipotent God sees
Seeking my Lord and Saviour
To be the person whom the Lord wants


Inspiration On: Tuesday, 14 September 2016

It has been months I have been feeling miserable. My cell leader has been highlighting to me repetitively to learn to self care so that I can care others. I begin realise that it is my mistakes to let others enter into my boundaries. I refuse to let my patterns to continue and ask God for wisdom. Wish you all have good days and thank you.