If Not For Jesus!

If not for Jesus, I would take matter into my hands!
If not for Jesus, I would leave you!
If not for my Lord, I would have commit suicide!
If not for my Lord, I would avoid you!
If not for my Saviour, I only give you one chance!
If not for my Saviour, I would lock my door!
If not for my God, I would bark!

Yet you barge into my fence of boundaries!
Yet you take me for granted!
Yet you enjoy hurting me more!
Your ACTIONS and WORDS are inconsistent!
You always beat around the bush!

What do you WANT from me?!
I feel sick of your arrogance!
You cause me to fall into the pit of depression!
Initially
You give me the joy of life
You share your faith in Jesus
You give me the hope of
“Two is better than one”
A close confidant

If not for Jesus, I would not trust you!
If not for my Lord, I would not forgive you!
If not for my Saviour, I would forsake you!
I have enough!

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Inspiration On: Thursday, 21 May 2015 at 12:15pm

This is the sequel to Why Do You? poetry. You have read the previous journey of my poetry. My heart and trust are fully broken. Wish you all have good days and thank you.

Dread Weighing Machine

Unlike normal girls
Unusual among the common girls
I have the tendency of
Avoiding weighing machine most of the time
Dreading of
Standing on the weighing machine

Standing on the weighing machine
Dreads me all the time
Insecure feeling sips in
Fearing escalating weight
Tearing me apart
That’s me

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Inspiration On: Thursday, 9 January 2014 at 3:14am

Recently, I begin to lose weight and look slimmer. As I recount my feelings, this poetry is birthed out with the last two lines of the first stanza. I hope all of you enjoy my poetry and to give me your comments and opinions.

Slip Trip

I slip
I trip

Avoiding splashes from running vehicles
Lightning flashes bomb me with fear

Paralyze my movement
Tantalize my breathing speed

Mind blanks out
Find heartbeat escalate

See the bus shelter
Bee hides under it

Rushing towards my destination
Dashing pass the trees

Almost fall into the drain
Within one feet distance
Rubber shoes stop me
Straining toes heavily to the ground

The black yellow bee seems grinning
Upheaval embarrassment is blushing my face

And the bus comes waving goodbye to the bee
As the bee slips its tiny feet against the wet pole
Knocks and trips onto the wet ground

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Inspiration On: Wednesday, 18 December 2013 from 7:25pm to 8:26pm

It was raining heavily and observing the raindrops on the road. Afraid of tripping myself, I walked slowly towards the bus stop. This experience births out the rhyming words, let my imagination runs wild and playing with English words in my vocabulary memory.

Weak or Dislike Fight

Is quiet being considered as weak?
Does refusing to fight back is considered weak?
We, the introverts, prefer to avoid quarrel
We dislike fight
We dislike quarrel
We hope the bully starters to stop barking

Why should you (bully starters) find fault with us?
What do you (bully starters) dislike in us?
We, the introverts, love peace
We love quietness
We love amicable resolution
We wish the bully starters to respect our boundaries

Bully starters, please stop bullying the weak
Before the situation switch over
And you regret your attitudes and doings
Be more understanding
Be more respectful
Please stop your bullying upon the quiet

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Inspiration On: Saturday, 22 June 2013 at 1:35am to 2:16am

Recently, my niece and nephew came from abroad with their mother for a few days. They are my cousin’s wife and children. So they lodge at my house. My son was very happy to have a friend to play. My niece chose to stay home than going out with her mother and my mother. At first, he allowed her to play his tricycle then I snatched back. Sometimes he resort to hitting. He hit my niece who is older than him by one year. But she reminds me of myself. Though she was hit a few times, she didn’t fight back. She chooses to avoid fight hoping the relationship will be well again. Though they are well again, the disagreement happened again. Of course, this raged me and told my son to stop hitting. I can resonate with my niece’s feeling. She is quiet who colours well and mind her own things. I enjoy looking at her colouring.

Recalling of my bad memories to be bullied at school and at home, my mindset resurfaced much clearer now.

Constant Nagging

A constant nagging
Deep inside
To finish a task

A constant nagging
Deep inside
Convicting own sin

A constant nagging
Deep inside
To avoid sin again

A constant nagging
Deep inside
To stay away from certain places.

A constant nagging
Deep inside
To do what is right.

A constant nagging
Deep inside
To stop living in the past

A constant nagging
Deep inside
To move forward with courage.

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Inspiration On: Wednesday, 15 May 2013 at 8:21pm
Inspiration Ends On: Saturday, 18 May 2013 at 1:35am

I wonder with the sudden words speaking to my mind, “A constant nagging”. Finally, the words flowed out.

Swaying Butt

Refusing to brush his teeth;
Feet sticking to the wall;
Arms onto grandma’s bed.
Helper shouts for his dad’s help.
His dad enters grandma’s room
With a dark face
Nearing him . . .

Brooh! Brooh! Brooh!
Saliva onto his dad’s face
IMPOLITE!
Hand is going to slap!
But . . .
Swaying butt to the left
Swaying butt to the right
Repetitively
Avoid his slapping hand.
Swaying butt to the left
Swaying butt to the right
Continuously
Avoid his slapping hand again.

Stop his butt and . . .
SLAP!
Mouth turns downward
Sad . . .
Holding his tears.
He is sorry.
His dad returns to his room;
Downward mouth turns upward
Grinning!

Inspiration On: Saturday, 2 February 2013 at 12:02am

After I reached home from attending self-publishing workshop, my mother and helper reported to me of my toddler’s second mischief. So the above inspiration was birthed forth. During the swaying of butt, my helper laughed until her stomach pain.