Toxic of Jealousy

Unsightly family harmony
Pick a quarrel
Enjoy fighting
With words
Lashing painful words
Seeking to control
Seeking to destroy
The new family

Jealousy control
Giving evil reign
Upon self
Seeking others’ fault
Blind to own’s fault
No wonder people
Stand afar from
An unrepentant heart
A blind mind
A deaf ear
Assuming others like
The unrepentant heart’s
Hypocritical mindset
Misunderstand others’
Kindness and goodwill

Influence her own good friend
To believe her speech
To believe she is victim
Misunderstand others’
Messages
Wrong perception of others
Kindness and goodwill
Confronting me for shouting
At his good friend
Without searching the truth
Without asking my reason


Inspiration On: Wednesday, 17 July 2013 at 12:34am
Inspiration Ends On: Friday, 19 July 2013 at 6:52pm
Compiled On: Friday, 19 July 2013 at 7:44pm

Reading Darky Blue’s poetry at http://darkyblue.wordpress.com/2013/07/15/how-many-is-too-many/ reminded me of my friend’s case whom i just shared her experience.

Wednesday, 17 July 2013

Her nurse friend whom she confided to diagnose her with depression for the situation I have shared through my previous poetry for her. Her dad who recently told her that if she didn’t explain the truth she will be miserable and people will continually bully her. Because she felt that it was useless for her to say so since her husband won’t believe her words and he believed his mother’s words more than her. What’s the point for her to say more? Wasting her time. She didn’t want her marriage to be broken. Her nurse friend helped her to pray and queried whether she ever eat a medicine from a doctor. Yes was her reply, but it had stopped. So her friend suggested to her to see again to let the medicine help her to relax. Her friend and I also don’t want to see her to be taken away to the mental hospital.

After many requests for her husband’s contact, she hesitantly wrote down her husband’s number with trembling hands. Her nurse friend who called her husband that she was with his wife, he was happy. Unexpectedly, her husband was shocked with her nurse friend who divulged she had suicidal attempts. Alarmed not to worry her husband, she tried to stop her nurse friend for saying so. But it was too late. He immediately rushed to fetch her. Her nurse friend comforted her that her husband still care for her.

Sending her to the mrt station to meet her husband, she seemed reluctant to follow her husband. But her nurse friend introduced herself and asked him to love her and protect her. He willingly agreed. Holding hands, he gently explains the reason he scolded her for giving the feeling his mother was unwelcomed. All she thinks are to move her brother’s things out of the room, but expressed it wrongly due to thinking visually with wrong words. Her father had discussed the problem with him amicably and resolved to let him be the middle person. If there is unhappiness, his mother and her dad will go to him. This is due to her dad is worried for her not being able to convey the message correctly. Peace is restored. Since he had apologized to mother and dad, he hoped her to apologize to his mother. When she was going to apologize, the phone rang. It was her sister in law confronting her for shouting. Angered by those words and realizing her mother in law’s dishonesty, she went to bathroom to pray for God’s help to forgive her mother in law just as He had forgiven her. Having showered helped to cool down and apologize to her mother in law. Shocked with her reactions to immediately hug her and also apologize for her own fault.

Thursday, 18 July 2013

Being alone in her house, she felt peaceful and can concentrate on her freelance work. Her parents went out. Her mother in law schedules her son’s playground at her brother in law’s house. While her husband and her holding hands together guiding the way, the helper observed her mother in law looked very angry, instead of being happy for her son. Her helper told her in the middle of the night before sleep. She had been wondering why her mother in law was so jealous of her.

Friday, 19 July 2013

Yesterday, she had fixed an appointment with her previous neurology. Today, her neurology told the same thing to her to tell her husband the truth what she had been through with her mother in law. The truth will let her husband to think. Not her to do so all the time. If she continues to keep quiet, she will be miserable. He also reminded her of the wedding woes to share to her husband her troubles. Unhappy with this, she had been wondering and didn’t wish to hurt her mother in law.

Everyone’s Basis of Statement through Analysis from her previous talk. Her mother in law went through divorce at the age of 30 for her husband left her for another woman. Her husband’s siblings rebuked and blamed her for being too brawling. So he couldn’t stand her.

But my friend feels what that has got to do with her. What does she has to make her mother in law jealous?

Averted Tragedy

Ring! Ring!
In silence
Ring! Ring!
In silence
Continuous Ring!
In silence
Talk has ended
Many missed calls
In mobile phone
Beep!
Text message to
Return home immediately
Another text message warning
Sister in law asks her mobile number
Fear engulfs her mind

Rushing home
Awaiting bus
Boarding the bus
Answer the ringing phone
Scolding her for shouting at
His mum
Without asking the reason
Digging out painful memories

During school days
Her primary 4 school teacher
Punished her and shamed her
In front of the class
Without asking the reason
For her retaliation towards
Her bullies
The bullying person only
Report her doings
Covering his doings

His angry tone forcing her to
Apologize to his mum
Retaliate her emotion to reply angrily
But speaking the truth
Of his mother’s
Many shouting and hurtful words
She has been enduring for
Three years of marriage
Abruptly switches off her mobile phone

Arriving bus interchange
Fear engulfs her heart
Mind staggers
First time in life
Not wishing to return home
Thoughts of being scolded
Insert fear into her
Unexpectedly, a nurse friend
Stays nearby
Unexpectedly, her friend’s care
Enable her to pour out
Her nurse friend had encountered similar case
Sharing other’s difficulties as well

Pouring out all her woes
Connection between past and current woes
Tears flow out uncontrollably
Without knowing she is under
Depression
Until her nurse friend highlight
Caringly suggest to visit her past neurologist
Before mental breakdown clouds her

Meanwhile, at home
Quarrel outburst
But ended to
Amicable Discussion
Between father in law
And son in law

Back to her scene
Her nurse friend prays for her
Her nurse friend suggests to
Contact her husband to fetch her
Fear prevents her to give
Repeated caring comforts and requests
Relented her to write down his name and contact
With trembling hands and fingers
Her nurse friend chooses to do so
To prevent her from doing foolish actions

Press the button to call her husband
His tone seems happy but turns to worry
Upon hearing her plight and quickly fetch her
At the meeting station
Her nurse friend introduces herself
Her nurse friend re-affirm to love and protect her
Hesitantly she returns with her husband

Holding hands
Gently apologize
Gently explaining his reasons
Gently care her
As they brisk along the long lane towards home
Thank you for praying for her


Inspiration On: Thursday, 1 August 2013 at 1am
Inspiration Ends On: Saturday, 3 August 2013 at 7:51pm

This event on Wednesday afternoon 17 July, tragedy almost occurred upon my friend’s life and family. By God’s grace, this tragedy is averted. Thank you everyone for your prayers. She will be very grateful for your prayers.

Poetry & Illustration

Dazing
Daydreaming
Imagination runs wild
Observing every surroundings
Ache
Agony
Anger
Arrogance
Longing
Jealousy
Hatred
Fighting
Hurt
Pain
Love
Joy
Passion
Zeal
Sacrifice
Prayer
Hope
Dreams

Emit out via

Nib of pen on a piece of paper
Line by line
Writing a poetry
Pictures from mind

Paper in the typewriter
Alphabets stick onto papers
Line by line
Writing a poetry

Computer keyboard
Jotting in poetry
Alphabet by alphabet
Word by word
Line by line.

Nib of pen on a piece of paper
Lines
Curves
Ovals
Triangles
Squares
Rectangles
Illustrating pictures

Drawing tablet
Lines
Curves
Ovals
Triangles
Squares
Rectangles
Illustrating pictures.


Inspiration On: Thursday, 7 March 2013 at 12:14am

I don’t know what is going on in my mind. I’m a visual person and often being tongue-tied when I’m panic. And now I’m writing poetry. I don’t know what God has in store for me. Weird. Every words begin to fall and drop into my mind. But I still thank God for this experience.

They were right. There is Heaven! by Eric Alagan

During my early blogging in my ministry, Eric Alagan is a writer whom found me and we followed each other’s post. I enjoy reading his works especially his beautiful pictures with meaningful words. I seek his permission to save it as my wallpaper. You can follow him at http://ericalagan.net

During my early blogging in my ministry, Eric Alagan is a writer whom found me and we followed each other’s post. I enjoy reading his works especially his beautiful pictures with meaningful words. I seek his permission to save it as my wallpaper. You can follow him at http://ericalagan.net

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Play on Cot

Stick out legs
Pull in legs
Out of the cot bars

Stick out legs
Pull in legs
Out of the cot bars
Seems fun

On his cot
Stick out legs
Pull in legs
Out of the cot bars

But . . .
Now . . .
Suddenly . . .

Escalating cry
Crying to wail
Moaning in pain
Seeking for help

Oh, thigh is stuck
Stuck between bars
Bars of his cot!

Apply lotion to the area of his
His thigh, knee, and calf.
My helper helps out
Helps me to pull him
While I push in.

Praise the Lord that
I thank God that
That my baby is fine
Though reddish left thigh.


Inspiration On: Monday, 8 October 2012 at 1:54pm

My toddler enjoys sticking out his legs out of the cot bar. Then he pulls back. While he was drinking milk, I cleared my spouse’s documents on the tray. Suddenly, he cried turned to wail in pain. To find out, his thigh was stuck between the bars with his knee stopping him from pulling in. My helper and I tried to help him. Using baby lotion to apply from his thigh to his legs then I informed my helper to go to the other side to pull him with me pushing his thigh. Thank God that his leg could return to his cot. And he mentioned that he did not dare to do so anymore.

As The Sun Arise

As the sun arise
Prepare before school commences
Sitting in an opened fridge
Munching breakfast, brush teeth, change to uniform
Hop into kijang’s middle seat
My father drives with mother besides him
My little brother is next to me
Queuing, passing by numerous cars into lanes and streets
Then immediately reach school
Throw my bag onto my seat
The school bell rings
And rush to march.

As the sun arise
Loud horrifying crows’ sound
Startled me from dreamland
Though can not sleep
Quiet time gives strength
Immediately, prepare to go
To work without hassle.

As the sun arise
Little birdies are chirping
Chirping with melody enters
My dreamy ears and
Heard in my dreamland
Cooling air-conditioner suddenly auto-stops
A cute voice calls
Waking me from dream
My head turn right
Capturing a pleasant sight
Who is greeting me
With his captivating smile
Compelling my heart to
Walk towards my toddler
Where he lovingly gives
Three morning greetings with
A caring hair rub
And so do I
Then we pray together
And push his cot
Out of the room
Feeding milk, change clothes,
Wet wipe his face
To freshen him up
Next, dry wipe and
Time to be together.


Inspiration On: Tuesday, 24 July 2012 at 2:48pm
Inspiration Ends On: Sunday, 29 July 2012 at 1:45am.

As I reminisced about my Tuesday’s experiences of having a two years old toddler, the inspiration in the third paragraph was birthed out.

Furthermore, my memories during my youth and children were sparked and depicted at the first and second paragraph.

Later on, I revised it upon referring back to it repeatedly.

God really amazes me to unexpectedly leading me into poetry for not being an eloquent speaker.

Cute Dog Pee Stance

Body facing backward towards the television rack
Pulling legs apart similar to a dog pee stance
With his right foot touches the cover
The cover of the television rack
Slowly, his foot closes it
Everyone’s eyes pop out
But turns to
Amazement,
Awe,
Cheers, and
End in applause.


Inspiration On: Thursday, 26 July 2012 at 12:40am
Revised On: Saturday, 28 July 2012 at 3:25am

Upon returning home from a workshop class held in the library, my mother and helper informed me about my toddler’s actions. My helper laughingly showed the way he acted. My parents are laughing as they re-told his cute and funny stances. These reminded me the previous day I closed the cover of the television rack with my right foot though facing forward. Unexpectedly, my toddler mimicked my actions in an extreme way due to his various experiences. When he was much younger, he saw a puppy’s stance to pee whenever my husband and I brought him out for a walk.

Upon imagining these things in my mind, the above inspiration was birthed out as I kept on revising it continuously. I’m amazed by the little boy God has blessed me with. Unknowingly, many of his little actions give me inspirations.

Tick Tick

Tick tick
Tick tick

Tick tick
Tick tick

A head laid onto bolster
It is my husband’s head
Turning his head to find
The source of the sound
Tick tick tick tick tick

Suddenly, he whispers his worries

The tick tick sound causes
A gruesome nightmare to him
The air conditioner leaks again
Upon waking up, the sound
Comes out from his right
The person sleeping next to him.

Oh, I was typing on
An old iPod just given
From my brother who upgrades
Then he willingly passes it
To me. In actual fact
The iPod belongs to my dad.

Tick tick
Tick tick
Is the sound of typing
Into the notes of iPod
Typing down what inspires me
From the paper of mini-notebook
For an easy upload to the web.

Swiftly, I explore the settings
Searching up and down prayerfully
Praise God and thank God
To open my eyes to
Switch off the typing sound.
Thank God for His wisdom
Upon me through Christ Jesus.
Praise Him and glorify Him!


Inspiration On: Sunday, 1 July 2012 from 1:30am to 1:50am
Revised On: Sunday, 1 July 2012 at 5:04pm

As I was typing the 有恐龙 poetry from my notebook into iPod, my husband looked baffled on my bolster then gently whisper his nightmare. I immediately stopped typing and tried to go to iPod’s setting to remove the tick sound. Thank God for Him to open my eyes to choose which option to switch off the tick sound. I didn’t mean to disturb my husband’s sleep. The past few days, my husband was sound asleep while I was typing. Unexpectedly, tonight is a different sleeping weather for him.

Spinning

Suddenly the world seems spinning
Spinning to the point of
My body lose its balance
Balance of stand still
Balance to walk
Then I realize
My head is spinning
My mind immediately goes blank
Quickly, I held the table in front of me
Closing my eyes

A few seconds later
Everything returns to normal


Inspiration On: Wednesday, 7 March 2012 at 3pm plus
Revised On: Thursday, 8 March, 2012 at 10:55pm

The first sentence came when I felt giddy at the food court. All I can do is to quickly find something to hold on to. Thank God for the wisdom what to do. So I immediately take sweet according to what my mother ever told me what I should do if there is a sudden dizzy.