Slogging through the Midnight

Slogging through the midnight
Wishing to alter my sleeping habit
Only to realize
Determination alone isn’t enough
Strong will alone isn’t enough
Mind alone isn’t enough
Own plan will not prevail
Fatigue body in control
Render myself helpless
Entering the dream entrance
Exiting the dream world late morning
Changing sleeping habit fails

Slogging through the midnight
Wishing to alter my sleeping habit
Awaiting dawn
Leave my sleeping bed
Entering into an empty room
Switching on the light
Thinking poetry
Processing my thoughts
Writing poetry
Awaiting dawn
To pass the day sleepily
Possibly to sleep at 9 o’clock night


Inspiration On: Wednesday, 7 January 2014 from 12am to 3:41am

Hoping to change my unhealthy sleeping habit, I resolved to have a sleepless night in order to wake up early at 5am in the morning. Looking through the incomplete poetry to pass the midnight. Most attempts were failed due I fell asleep. This time I try again and see the result. The keyword “slogging through the night” helped me to begin this poetry.

Bleak

I am feeling helpless.
Where do I go?

Everything seems very dark
I can’t see anything
What do I touch?
Where do I go?
Heart missed a beat
No, not just that.
Fear engulfs my heart
I can hear clearly
My heartbeat is beating
Rapidly. And also loud.

Anxiety, depression, fear, sadness
Are the feelings that
I am going through.

Anxious of the future
Past regrets came back
Something I had wished
I would not do.

Depressed of the previous
Mistakes I had done.
What I can do?
No turning back to
Correct all my mistakes.

Presently, everyday seems dull.
Everyday, always repeat the
Same repeated boring tasks.

My goal is getting
Much further away from
My grasp due to
Doing many unnecessary errands.

I feel hopeless and
Everything seems bleak and
I don’t know where
To go for help.


Inspiration On: Sunday, 7 November 2010 at 5:50AM