Core

Deep inside the core of
Our inner beings
Longing for 
Eternal love and full acceptance
In who we are

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Inspiration On: Tuesday, 9 September 2014 at 6pm

Many times, feelings are repressed in order not to hurt those whom we love. Living under others expectations are excruciatingly painful. Almost lost myself for caring too much. It is due to lack of boundary. They have overstepped my boundaries. Upon realizing this, I feel tired of not being heard. When I want to work on my ideas, they want me to find a full time job. When I want to find full time job and to postpone my marriage, they wants me to get married first. Ten months later, my son came into this world. My husband wants me not to work for three months. Three months into years. All I do I receiving project work. Neglecting my muse and ideas. Thereby, I am helpless and lack of income to provide for my parents. Feeling lost. Thank you for listening to me.

Poetry & Illustration

Dazing
Daydreaming
Imagination runs wild
Observing every surroundings
Ache
Agony
Anger
Arrogance
Longing
Jealousy
Hatred
Fighting
Hurt
Pain
Love
Joy
Passion
Zeal
Sacrifice
Prayer
Hope
Dreams

Emit out via

Nib of pen on a piece of paper
Line by line
Writing a poetry
Pictures from mind

Paper in the typewriter
Alphabets stick onto papers
Line by line
Writing a poetry

Computer keyboard
Jotting in poetry
Alphabet by alphabet
Word by word
Line by line.

Nib of pen on a piece of paper
Lines
Curves
Ovals
Triangles
Squares
Rectangles
Illustrating pictures

Drawing tablet
Lines
Curves
Ovals
Triangles
Squares
Rectangles
Illustrating pictures.

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Inspiration On: Thursday, 7 March 2013 at 12:14am

I don’t know what is going on in my mind. I’m a visual person and often being tongue-tied when I’m panic. And now I’m writing poetry. I don’t know what God has in store for me. Weird. Every words begin to fall and drop into my mind. But I still thank God for this experience.

Buried Longing

Nothing
Nothing
Nothing can replace her
Someone…
Someone
Whom I long to see
Whom I long to meet
But never have the chance.

Papers of memory are
All I have.
Memories of her
Captured in photo.
She is my sister
My eldest sister
Whom I long to see
Whom I long to meet
Whom I long
Deep within my heart.

Living with such memory
Living with such longing
Hoping that the Lord
Will let me see her
One day.

People and relatives
Label me
Identify me
As the sister
Of the three years-old girl
Who died in a car accident.
But my sister is irreplaceable.
She is irreplaceable.
Irreplaceable
In my family’s hearts.

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Inspiration On: Sunday, 24 February 2013 from 1:17pm to 11:20pm

The movie ‘The Lovely Bones’ triggered my buried longing and moved me to tears. Watching the movie made me think that though my dad didn’t show his grievances, he still thinks of my eldest sister. My dad’s employee bragged that he could drive. So he drove my dad’s car into the house backyard recklessly. My eldest sister was playing at the backyard with my mum. Tragedy occurred as the car crashed onto the cupboard then it pressed hard onto her. Everything happened very fast. My mother was grieved. During her mourning for months then she conceived me and comforted.

No wonder I can’t write eldest sister in my narration during my school days.