At the crossroad of choices
Surrounded by mountains of career paths
Weighing the beginning and destination
Time to make decisions
Make frantic effort to adjust time
Energy tank signaling rapid depletion
Realizing distraction through humans
Asking the Lord for help through human guidance and discipline
Seeking His intervention
Inspiration On: Friday, 28 April 2017
The piles of work I have been doing seems daunting. Countless attempt to stand up. Loneliness sets in. I have been pouring out to God for someone whom I can discuss with. The budget I come out with is over-budget. I feel so powerless. Doing work slow me down. I feel so thankful to God to do part-time work as a teacher. The Lord knows that I am learning to manage myself and have issue to manage the students. He knows my fear of being bullied. Today I ask my lead instructor how to sound firm. He feels that I should know when I sound firm. Oh, I feel so speechless. I can feel that my energy depletes rapidly. Is it due to me learning to manage 40 students in an hour? Wish you all have good days and thank you.
Given another choice
Offered counsel and help nearby house
Nothing else deter me
According to the Lord’s leading and comfort
Inspiration On: Sunday, 15 November 2015
A prayerful pastor to listen to my woes and problems; pray for me for the Lord’s will be done through me. She comforts me that it is kept confidential. I choose another church through God’s leading though I prefer smaller churches. Finally, I have the courage to confess the false accusations onto my son from his own dad. His pet fish’s death accused to my son. Until my son shouted to be wrongfully accused.
Wish you all have good days and thank you.
Why do you come into my life?
Why do you come to mess my life?
Why are you jealous of me?
Your grades are better then mine.
You have smarter brain than I am.
Why are you so suspicious of me?
Where do I give you misunderstanding?
I just want to bless you surprisingly.
Why do you use my weakness to put me down?
I thought you are my confidant.
There is so much thing I want to share with you.
My lips are tight
I can not trust you
Why I can not trust you?
Because you lie to me!
Because you add wounds to my salt!
Make my life like a hell!
Why do you believe the devil’s lies?
Do you love to misjudge others?
Do you still live in your mother’s cloud of influence and decision?
Why do you take advantage of my naiveness?
Why do you take advantage of my confusion?
Why do you love to put your words into others’ mouth?
I can not believe your words anymore.
Inspiration On: Thursday, 21 May 2015 at 12pm
A lot of strange events occur in my life. When I mean well, my mother in law and husband misunderstood me. When I begin to trust him again and confide in him, he betray my trust. Maybe I look highly of him. Every year, my mother in law gave warnings of divorce threats to me. Then my husband always let me to make the decisions. When the result of my decision turns out well, no appreciation. Yet when the result of my decision is wrong, he always pick on me and put me down. I have felt worse. Yet he makes me feel much worse. Despite my parents warning, I feel foolish to pity my mother in law. But she falsely accused my mother and I out of her jealousy. Recently, my husband loves to start to the quarrel and blame me. Wish you all have good days and thank you.
Brushing own opinion aside
Casting own voice away
Dragged by others’ decision
Am I voiceless?
Living in accordance to others’ voice
Am I voiceless?
Unwilling to hurt others’ feelings
But I am hurting inside
Alive but voiceless
Only to be rejected
Only to be misunderstood
Taken for granted?
Am I voiceless?
Am I voiceless . . . ?
Are my opinions worthless?
Inspiration On: Monday, 21 April 2014 from 12:45am to 4:38am
Current upheaval life from inside and outside rubbed salt into my past pain and worsened it deeply. Thus, such feelings evokes and birthing out this poetry. Wish you all have good days and thank you for reading my poetry.
Thursday, 23 January 2014
1. Live under the decision of others
2. My indecisiveness cost my current situation
Tuesday, 11 February 2014
The cycle of life is continuum
Friday, 14 February 2014
An indecisive freak is lost forever
During attending a talk, the speaker introduced about the Six Word Submission at SmithMag.net and gave the participants papers to write their own six words about life. The above birthed out of my own life experience. Do participate in its creative ways to describe about lives and other stuffs. Enjoy.